For example, a friend tells you she is thinking about dropping out of college at the end of the semester. The first is empathetic listening, for understanding the feelings and motivations of another person, usually with a goal to helping the person deal with a personal problem. There are other “types” of listening, based on the context and purpose. In this section, we will focus on comprehensive listening, which is listening focused on understanding and remembering important information from a public speaking message. Many studies have been conducted to find out how long we remember oral messages, and often the level of memory from oral communication is not very high (Bostrom & Bryant, 1980). If the message is recorded, you can play it over, but if the situation is a speech, once may be all you get. As one of the appendices will note, real research on learning styles is actually limited.Īlso, when you read, you can go back and read a passage over and over until you understand it. Having a particular learning preference should never be used as an excuse we learn in all three modes, depending on the context and subject matter, even if one is stronger. Many of us have a strength in one of these areas, or at least a preference. You may have taken a learning styles inventory at some point and learned that you were either a visual, auditory, or kinesthetic learner, or maybe a combination. Listening implies an active process where you are specifically making an effort to understand, process, and retain information.Īlso, although both reading and listening are methods of taking in information, they are very different processes. You may hear cars honking or dogs barking when you are walking down the street because your brain is processing the sounds, but that does not mean that you are listening to them. ![]() Hearing is a physical process in which sound waves hit your ear drums and send a message to your brain. Listening is not the same thing as hearing. Studying public speaking should make you a better listener because you see the value of the listener to the communication process and because you are more aware of what you do in a speech. However, public speaking only works if there are listeners. To this point in the text, and for most of the rest of it, we focus on the “sending” part of the communication process. The skillful negotiator orchestrates these aspects of active listening to draw out the other party’s concerns and feelings, with an eye toward asserting his own viewpoint and engaging in joint problem-solving.\) Acknowledge: “It sounds as if you’re quite disappointed with various elements of our proposal, so much so that you have serious concerns about whether we’ll be able to work together over the long haul.”.Let’s also talk about how we might set up a pricing structure that you find more reasonable.” Help me understand how you came to this conclusion. Inquire: “You mentioned that you found our proposed price to be unacceptable.You’re also concerned about our proposed per-unit price and our willingness to work with you to create an acceptable arrangement. But if I understand correctly, you need me to assure you that we can increase production if large orders come in. Paraphrase: “It sounds as if you’re satisfied with our component overall.Here’s how you might respond using characteristics of negotiation styles incorporating active listening: We think you have a terrific product, but if you’re not going to work with us, we’re prepared to find someone who will.” Frankly, your price per unit is unacceptable. You submit a written sales proposal to the manufacturer.Īt your initial meeting with the buyer’s rep, she asserts: “Your proposal doesn’t give us the assurances we need that you can ramp up production if demand skyrockets. ![]() Negotiation example in real life:Suppose you’re a supplier of a state-of-the-art component for a new medical imaging device. Rather, active listening is a dynamic process that can be broken down into three different behaviors: paraphrasing, inquiry, and acknowledgment. Nor does it simply entail saying “I understand” or establishing good eye contact. Three Listening Skills for successful NegotiationsĬontrary to popular belief, active listening doesn’t mean sitting patiently while your counterpart talks. ![]() Download our FREE special report, Negotiation Skills: Negotiation Strategies and Negotiation Techniques to Help You Become a Better Negotiator, from the Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School. Build powerful negotiation skills and become a better dealmaker and leader.
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